Tuesday Funnies ~ Ageless Wit & Observations

If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.

-- Mark Twain
Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress....But then I repeat myself.
--Mark Twain
I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
--Winston Churchill
A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
--George Bernard Shaw
A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money.

--G Gordon Liddy
Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner.
--James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)
Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.
--Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
--P.J. O'Rourke, Civil Libertarian
Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else.
--Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)
Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.

--Ronald Reagan (1986)
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

--Will Rogers
If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free!

--P.J. O'Rourke
In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other.

--Voltaire (1764)
Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you!

--Pericles (430 B.C.)
No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.

--Mark Twain (1866)
Talk is cheap...except when Congress does it.

--Unknown
The government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other.

--Ronald Reagan
The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery.
--Winston Churchill
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. --Mark Twain
The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools.

--Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)
There is no distinctly Native American criminal class...save Congress.

--Mark Twain
What this country needs are more unemployed politicians.

--Edward Langley, Artist (1928 - 1995)

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.

--Thomas Jefferson